Eric Bay-Andersen reviews Red Dwarf XI Episode 6 – ‘Can of Worms’…
Lister – What happened? Did you sleep with her?
Cat – Hey, I ain’t kissing and telling – I’ve had enough kissing for one night, let me tell ya!
Rimmer – You don’t understand, we need to know.
Cat – All I’m saying is she had some moves you’ve never even seen!
Lister – Like what?
Cat – Like when you’re rolling around making out and the next thing you know her great pipe thing shoots out of her back, hovers above you like a crazy snake, then whooshes straight down your throat!
Lister – Cat, women don’t have a big pipe thing!
Cat – Not for you, maybe!
Series XI draws to a close with an episode that’s decent but sadly not a classic. It starts with Kryten telling Rimmer about a machine he’s installed that can sculpt and alter a person’s personality. Lister then falls asleep whilst on navigation duty and steers the ship wildly off course. They consider taking a shortcut through an asteroid belt where Vampire Gelfs are known to prowl looking for virgins to devour – Cat suggests they find an alternative route without explaining why, but it’s obvious. They then come across a ship with a sole survivor – a Lady Cat! They bring her back to Red Dwarf, and only after her and the Cat have had a little ‘private time’ together do they discover that she’s a Polymorph, and that Cat is now pregnant with a litter of Morphlings!
The crew decide to flush them into space, but the Cat, having grown attached to them, can’t bring himself to do it. Faced with the scary prospect of six Polymorphs loose on board the ship, Lister uses the Personality Surgery machine to rid himself of his fear (a story element that isn’t very well utilised, truth be told) so he can eliminate them, but they complicate matters by morphing into copies of the crew. The Cat saves them all by deciphering which of them are the Morphlings, and the episode ends with him dreaming of having a threesome with a couple of Lady Cats, requesting they doing a certain ‘move’ the Polymorph did on him!
The biggest problem with this episode is the awkward pace – it feels like a collection of scenes that are amusing on their own, but often feel like false-starts. The comedic timing of the cast was a little off, and the writing seemed to set up potentially funny ideas only to abandon them for something else. For example, there was easily a lot more comedy mileage to be gained from the Personality Surgery device, I would love to have had a couple more scenes getting to know the Lady Cat, and even though Cat’s pun when he shoots the Kryten/Rimmer/Lister imposters (“A mama always knows her kids”) is funny, I was hoping for a scene similar to the one in the original ‘Polymorph’ episode where they make the two Listers play guitar to discover which is the real one.
However, one scene that truly delivered (if you’ll pardon the pun) was the montage of Cat’s pregnancy and birth. It made me laugh louder and longer than perhaps any other sequence this series – seeing Cat’s pained expression as Lister pulls the Morphlings out of him (in the shape of pineapples, model boats, wind-up teeth toys etc.) is truly hilarious. Another joke I loved was when Lister discovers a tape recording of Rimmer giving himself positive encouragement (“You will achieve all your dreams. Size doesn’t matter. You are very attractive”), which came as a nice change after a few scenes of jokes that were rather predictable. Also, bringing back the Polymorph as the main plot device displayed a sad lack of originality, especially when there were other avenues the story could have explored to differentiate it more from episodes where the creature has featured before.
A bit of a limp conclusion to a series that certainly had some highlights but overall failed to reach the standards set by the classic Grant/Naylor years. That being said, it’s still light years better than most British comedy at the moment, and it’s always a pleasure spending time with the boys from the Dwarf. I look forward to seeing what they have in store for us with series XII next year.
‘Can Of Worms’ is available to watch now on UKTVPlay.co.uk, and will air on Dave on 27th October 2016 at 9pm.
