Tony Black with the top five moments from the second episode of Game of Thrones season seven…
1 – THEON GREYJOY STRIKES AGAIN!
Just when you think Theon Greyjoy may have got his shit together, he goes and literally, as well as figuratively, jump ship. Euron’s ship battle ambush is frenetic and exciting but over a little too quickly to top the Battle of the Blackwater–as was promised–but Theon’s surprising, if in character, cowardly run awaaaaaay moment makes you wonder just where he can possibly go now. Yara is gonna skin him alive if she survives her uncle!
2 – YOU’RE A DRAGON
Let’s face it, we all want Olenna Tyrell to get her own spin-off, don’t we? Even in front of the Mother of Dragons she still doesn’t give a crap what she says and we love her for it. Here, amidst squabbling counsellors from half a dozen noble backgrounds, Olenna imparts some wisdom Daenerys would do well to listen to – men are rubbish, and be the dragon she is. A powerful moment of feminine power from one badass woman to another.
3 – ARYA & NYMERIA
Nymeria! Years and years of fan theories about Nymeria, last seen in season 1, running around Westeros with her own wolf pack are confirmed as Arya meets her direwolf for the first time since she was a little girl. So much has changed for her since that last meeting and while Nymeria appears to reject Arya here, how long before Arya has an actual pack of wolves to help her cut through the sheep? This is one reunion it was a delight to finally see happen.
4 – I’M A MONSTER!!!!
Poor noble, lovelorn Ser Jorah! As if getting friend zoned by the Khaleesi wasn’t enough, but the grayscale disease is now turning him into a scaly monster. Thank god for Sam Tarly, putting it all on the line to help him, but yowser the moment he starts picking Jorah’s puss-filled scabs before a sharp cut to a man eating a mushroom pie is yet another example of how the guys who edit this show are sick sick puppies.
5 – JON V LITTLEFINGER
On a scale of one to ten, how much do you want someone to punch Littlefinger in his smug, pinched face? Jon comes very very close here as their first proper chinwag turns out to leave Littlefinger with a sore throat and Jon a serious case of the self-doubt. Quite what Littlefinger is up to is questionable, as ever, but Jon almost smacking him down next to the crypt of Ned makes you wonder just how long creepy old Petyr might last.
HONOURABLE MENTION – HOT PIE!
It’s Hot Pie! And he appears to *really* have been enjoying all those pies all these years!
Tony Black