Irish Wish, 2024.
Directed by Janeen Damian.
Starring Lindsay Lohan, Ed Speleers, Alexander Vlahos, Ayesha Curry, Elizabeth Tan, Jacinta Mulcahy, Jane Seymour, Matty McCabe, Dawn Bradfield, Maurice Byrne, James Rottger, Aidan Jordan, Dakota Lohan, Tim Landers, Steve Hartland, and Carl Shaaban.
When the love of Maddie’s life gets engaged to her best friend, she puts her feelings aside to be a bridesmaid at their wedding in Ireland.
Is wishing for characters to come away from a romantic comedy learning basic details about relationships (arguably things most people came to understand when they were teenagers) too much to ask for? Apparently, this is so for director Janeen Damian’s Lifetime-reminiscent Irish Wish, a film that knows these characters are basically romantically unstable but is also disinterested in holding any of that behavior accountable, particularly controlling behavior from a man who is questionably depicted as cutesy and lighthearted, with a script that isn’t sure if it should condemn him or paint him as misunderstood. Then, there is Maddie Kelly (Lindsay Lohan), who applies the wrong lessons during the final scene.
Irish Wish introduces Maddie as an editor smitten with her novelist employer, Paul Kennedy (Alexander Vlahos), a seemingly nice guy but one who doesn’t realize how much of his success is owed to her. A case could be made that she is a co-writer, balancing out some of Paul’s more cynical impulses on love (one of the books appears to be about a seductive evil fairy that hurts men.) She is also eager to write a novel, struggling to find the time between punching up his work and sitting around hoping he decides he has feelings for her. Maddie’s infatuation runs deep, but she is too shy to say anything about it herself.
In the blink of an eye, the story (from a screenplay by Kirsten Hansen) takes a leap where Paul is set to marry Maddie’s childhood best friend Emma (Elizabeth Tan) in a special ceremony that brings the characters to Ireland (and the cast on what seems like a glorified vacation given how clichéd and tediously routine this all is.) There is no drama and no hard feelings between the two since this film has no interest in exploring the complicated aspects of the friendship. Instead, it’s all an excuse for Maddie to come across the magical Saint Brigid (Dawn Bradfield) and wish she and Paul were together.
Waking up in her bed, Maddie’s reality has been altered, and she is now set to marry Paul on that same island. Meanwhile, she also meets handsome drifting photographer James (a dry, stiff, boring Ed Speleers), who is hard up for work and lands a job to take snapshots of the ceremony. While exploring landmarks to photograph, Maddie and James find themselves rained out from coming back to Paul’s wealthy estate one night, allowing the two to hit up a pub, play some darts, and connect about as much as two characters can when there is nothing but awkwardness and no chemistry between the performances.
Irish Wish is devoid of any personality, romantic heat, and laughs, practically begging viewers to laugh at repetitive slapstick humor of Lindsay Lohan falling down or accidentally bruising Paul (she is not used to a man getting in her bed at night when she is asleep, which startles her), or through a bizarre subplot that sees Saint Brigid using her magic to injure Maddie’s mother (Jane Seymour) keeping her off a flight to Ireland since fate appears to be against this wedding. Even when the film finally seems ready to criticize Paul, it pulls punches and leaves him off the hook for baffling reasons. The kindest thing there is to say is that the costume design is passable and Ireland has some beautiful views.
Between this and her recent Mean Girls musical remake cameo, it is pleasant to see Lindsay Lohan back on screens, but I already wish for better, even mediocre, material. Irish Wish is more like an Irish curse for anyone unfortunate enough to stumble upon it and press play.
Flickering Myth Rating – Film: ★ / Movie: ★ ★
Robert Kojder is a member of the Chicago Film Critics Association and the Critics Choice Association. He is also the Flickering Myth Reviews Editor. Check here for new reviews, follow my Twitter or Letterboxd, or email me at MetalGearSolid719@gmail.com