Gary Collinson selects his Ten Essential Star Wars Bit Parts…
George Lucas’ space fantasy Star Wars is renowned for producing a host of classic characters and pop culture icons – Luke Skywalker, Han Solo, Princess Leia, Chewbacca, droids R2-D2 and C-3PO and of course the ultimate villain, Darth Vader. But the beauty of Star Wars is in the detail, so here we take a look at the bit part players from A New Hope whose fifteen seconds of fame will live on forever in a galaxy far, far away…
Captain Raymus Antilles (a.k.a. the guy who gets strangled at the start)
Skipper of the Rebel Blockade Runner, Captain Antilles (no relation to Wedge) leads the Tantive IV in its daring mission to steal the plans for the dreaded Death Star. First introduced six inches from the floor (with Vader so aggrieved that he’s actually using has hand as a strangling device), Captain Antilles quickly comes to a sticky end after foolishly shitting up the Sith Lord with tales of diplomatic missions. “If this is a consular ship, where is the ambassador?” Didn’t quite think that one out, did you Antilles?
Captain Bolvan (a.k.a. the guy who detects no lifeforms)
Perhaps the most inept Imperial officer in Star Wars history, Captain Bolvan’s idiotic decision to hold fire on Artoo and Threepio’s escape pod ultimately leads to the destruction of the Death Star, the fall of the Galactic Empire and the death of its dictator, Emperor Palpatine. Given the briefest of screen time, the fact this guy has a name (not to mention a backstory) is almost unbelievable and if ever there was a case for gross misconduct, Bolvan surely seals it.
Biggs Darklighter (a.k.a. the guy with the moustache who can’t shake ‘em)
Mustachioed Rebel pilot and childhood friend of Luke Skywalker, Biggs Darklighter reunites with his Tatooine pal on the Yavin base as the Rebels prepare to launch their attack on the Death Star. “It’ll be like old times, Luke,” says Biggs, shortly before departing in a ball of fire. I bet that never happened when they were shooting womp rats down in Beggar’s Canyon back home. Sadly Biggs’ Tatooine scenes ended up on the cutting room floor, wasting the coolest costume in the entire saga.
General Jan Dodonna (a.k.a the guy who refuses to pronounce Leia like everyone else)
Bearded Rebel General Jan Dodonna is the mastermind behind the successful attack on the Death Star. Sending out a handful of fighters to face a heavily shielded battle station carrying firepower greater than half the star fleet, General Dodonna remains behind to coordinate the battle from the comfort of his giant craps table. Coming within mere seconds of oblivion, the Rebel high command obviously felt that Dodonna’s tactics were too risky and the General finds himself replaced by a woman and a fish for round two.
Garven Dreis (a.k.a. the guy with the sweaty top lip)
The second pilot to make the list, Garven Dreis leads Red Squadron at the Battle of Yavin and gets to dish out a number of orders like “lock s-foils in attack position”, “cut the chatter” and “accelerate to attack speed” to stamp his authority. Red Leader also has the first shot at becoming a hero before prematurely shooting his load, blowing his starboard engine, running foul of Vader’s TIE Fighter and crashing into the surface of the Death Star like a man possessed. Almost there (but not quite).
Dr. Cornelius Evazan (a.k.a the guy with the death sentence on twelve systems)
Even in a galaxy far, far away it’s difficult to enjoy a quiet pint without some drunken yob itching for a fight. Unfortunately for Dr. Evazan – who looks like he’s had his face rearranged on more than one occasion – and his associate Ponda Baba, picking on the ward of a distinguished Jedi Knight is probably not the wisest decision they’ve ever made. Evazan just doesn’t know when to quit either, refusing a drink and continuing to antagonise until he finds himself on the wrong end of a lightsaber.
Davish Krail (a.k.a. the guy who lost Tiree, lost Dutch)
Another Rebel pilot – this time part of the Y-Wing Gold Squadron – Davish Krail is responsible for counting the guns on the Death Star (twenty guns – he’s either blind, or the Imperials really are overconfident) and telling Gold Leader to stay on target until his superior gets blown away. Krail must have broken a few mirrors in his time because within a matter of seconds he’s lost another couple of his comrades and quickly joins them in the afterlife when they… come… from… be… hind.
Admiral Conan Antonio Motti (a.k.a. the guy with balls the size of Death Stars)
Head of Naval operations for the Galactic Empire, Admiral Motti really knows how to make friends and influence people. In just one short meeting he manages to belittle the capabilities of the Imperial Fleet, wave away the threat of the Rebellion and give Vader shit for his sad devotion to an ancient religion (since when is a couple of decades ancient, anyway?). Fortunately for Motti, Grand Moff Tarkin doesn’t fancy training up a replacement at such short notice and persuades Vader to release his force choke in the nick of time.
Jek Porkins (a.k.a. the guy with the most appropriate name in the galaxy)
Shoehorned into his cockpit, Rebel pilot Jek Porkins really puts the X-Wing suspension to the test as he bounces through the Death Star’s magnetic field and barely has time to report in before discovering that he’s got a problem. Ignoring Biggs’ plea to eject (not that ejecting into the vacuum of space is likely to save him), Porkins just about manages to state he’s all right before discovering that actually he isn’t all right in the slightest. The mess hall just won’t be the same again.
Colonel Wullf Yularen (a.k.a the guy with a different uniform to the rest)
Either Wulff Yularen is that important he gets to wear a white uniform, his suit has been in the wash so many times that it’s faded badly, or he just likes to colour coordinate with his moustache. Regardless, Colonel Sanders manages to make it on the list despite a lack of screen time, dialogue, expression and movement. In fact, if you’ve only seen the full-screen version it’s possible you’ve never even noticed him. He does crop up in The Clone Wars though, and in a normal suit.
Agree? Disagree? We’d love to hear your comments on the list…
Kudos to Wookieepedia for proving me with the names of some of the more obscure characters.
Gary Collinson
